By Andrea Pavlacka, '09 |Staff Reporter

Katie Koestner speaks to Morrisville College students about her experiences with rape. 

Photo By Kendra Spenard , '08

Katie Koestner didn’t come to Morrisville to gain our sympathy; she came to spread awareness about date rape and sexual assault.

The former date-rape victim presented her moving speech titled "No-Yes" in the STUAC Theater on Thursday.

Despite the terrible weather, there was an impressive turnout of attendees, the majority being women. Koestner shared her story with the audience with a cool, calm and collected disposition, pausing occasionally to catch her breath.

Koestner spoke in great detail of how she and her attacker had met. It was all those years ago at the College of William and Mary in Virginia. A large group of young men and women were watching Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail. Koestner’s attention drifted away from the movie after about three minutes, and she was casually glancing around the room when a particularly handsome young man caught her eye. When she glanced over a second time, she saw him staring longingly back at her. There was a mutual attraction at first sight.

Koestner eagerly figured out a way to see him again, and she succeeded one day in a campus cafeteria. His name was Peter and she recalled that he was very charming and handsome as if he was supposed to be in the pages of an Abercrombie and Fitch magazine.

The two hung out together on several occasions before Peter suggested they go on a real date to a nice restaurant with cloth napkins. Overwhelmed with joy, Koestner accepted.

Koestner and Peter went to a French restaurant not far from their campus, where Peter further impressed her by ordering their dinner in French. A waiter came to their table and put a glass of champagne in front of each of them. Katie whispered to Peter “but we’re not 21 yet.” Peter convinced her that champagne wouldn’t hurt her and that it would be alright.

Koestner decided that she didn’t want to ruin the date over a single glass of champagne, so she took two sips.

At this point in her speech, Koestner stated that looking back, “In my mind I’d only given in to two sips of champagne.” She now realizes that by giving in, she must have made Peter think he could bend her will to make her do way more than consume some alcohol.

Peter told Koestner about a vacation house his family owned in Greece and told her the two should go there together for the summer.

He then began listing some norms in Greece, one being that on a certain day of the week, the men got to go out and the women stayed home. The second was that there were different dress codes for the beach and for going out to restaurants. The third was that she would have to drink. And the final requirement was that she would have to have sex with him whenever he wanted.

Koestner laughed awkwardly at him, hoping it was a joke, but his demeanor remained as solemn as ever. “I got a very small knot in my stomach at that last comment,” she said “I ignored the knot. If I’d had more champagne, I wouldn’t have noticed it at all.”

From there, Koestner and Peter went back to her room where she had prepared a music compilation of songs that would set a romantic mood. She had no intentions whatsoever of having sex with him, because she wanted to wait until marriage, which she had made clear to him earlier that week.

While Koestner was setting up her stereo, she happened to glance in a mirror she had hanging on her closet door and saw that he had stripped down to his boxers and socks. Thinking on her feet, she decided her best course of action would be to take every pillow and stuffed animal off of her bed and throw them at him. Her tactic worked for a while until he had her pinned on the floor.

She managed to escape and Peter decided to go to bed. Koestner stayed awake the entire night, because it was the only way she knew to protect herself. She considered sleeping in the lounge area of her dorm building, but decided against it when she remembered that the main entrance was normally left unlocked.

Sometime around sunrise the next morning, Peter awoke suddenly, eyes darting around the room as if he couldn’t remember where he was.

His gaze fell on Koestner, who was still awake, sitting in the corner of her room. He convinced her to go to bed because she hadn’t slept a wink all night. Being exhausted, she agreed. That’s when it happened.

Peter had Koestner pinned against the wall when he raped her. Koestner did her best to put up a fight, but resistance was futile because Peter outweighed her by about 70 pounds.

During the struggle, Koestner bit a hole through the inside of her cheek. She would later use this scar as evidence against Peter. After it was all over, Peter dressed and was gone within five minutes of the ordeal.

She waited in her room until she knew he was gone, then went to the resident director’s office and told him what had happened. He proceeded to take her to the school dean, who in turn took her to campus police.

Although Koestner lodged her complaint, the dean advised her against seeking outside authority. Campus police told Koestner that the bruises on her inner thighs could only prove rough sex, not rape.

A short while later, Koestner, her attorney, Peter and his two attorneys met to discuss the events of that night. Peter was found guilty during the internal investigation. He had admitted that Koestner told him ‘no’ several times, but after a while she stopped saying no. This statement was the smoking gun.

Peter’s punishment was that he was banned from going into Koestner’s or any other dorms or fraternity houses on campus for the rest of the semester.

Throughout her presentation, Koestner made two remarkably important points that every student on campus should remember in terms of self-safety. The first was that drugs and alcohol can severely impede your judgment of a situation, and it's better to just avoid them altogether. The second, for the ladies: whenever you're with a guy you're not very familiar with, whether you're hanging out in your room or out at The Corral, it's imperative to command respect.

Koestner made a point of not leaving out the men in the room, commenting that even though she was raped by a man, she doesn't loathe or "eat men for breakfast." In addition, she presented a startling statistic from Kathleen Hirsch that "at least 1 in 4 women will be the victim of a sexual assault during her academic career." She pointed out for the men that even though men are sexually assaulted far less than women are (1 in 6 according to the National Institute of Justice), that a woman they know and love - a mother, sister, daughter or aunt - could become a victim as well.

Even more jarring, according to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, “at least 80% of all sexual assaults are committed by an acquaintance of the victim.”

Koestner emphasized the importance of victims of rape and sexual assault speaking out. Here at Morrisville State College, there are two counselors at the Student Health Center, Sara Mansfield and Pattie Samson. They are available Monday through Friday from 8:30a.m. - 4:30p.m.

Students can call (315) 684-6078 to make an appointment or come in and schedule an appointment. The counselors here are available for whatever students may be struggling with, and the services are free and confidential.